A SOLUTION TO DEPRESSION

Lately I have felt sad.  Depression has hit me like a ton of bricks.  Every day I work a little to get past these feelings but it seems to be a slow process.  I feel better for a little while and then I fall back down into the dumps.  Someone suggested to me that I write it all down.  Someone else told me how much they loved my stories and how they wished I would write them down and tell them to more than one person.  Putting the two thoughts together, here goes...

I'll start with a story about the two black labs that live in our back yard.  The two of them look a lot alike, being black labs both female, both fixed, the 'puppies' now grown are the the offspring of Gypsy.

THE STORY OF GYPSY

The story Gypsy goes like this.  Gypsy is half German Shepherd and half Timberwolf.  My son Joshua got her.  He made arrangements with someone in Lafayette, Louisiana to take a puppy when the litter was old enough to leave the mother shepherd (who'd been bred with a wolf).  Before he and his new bride could get the new puppy, though, someone hit his car that had been parked on the street in front of his mother's house. The Lafayette policecould do nothing more than take a report and he had only liability insurance.  Since he had lost his ride to work he called his job and when he said he could not make it in, they fired him on the phone.  He made arrangements with his Dad to come to our house in La Porte, TX.  The last thing that happened before Josh left Lafayette was that the people with the puppy told him he needed to come and get his dog.  So in mid June of 1999 Josh and his pregnant wife and a six week old puppy moved in with us.

I'll make this part of the story short.  Gypsy was a ball of fur when she was a puppy, but she got big fast. Gypsy lived in the back yard of our subdivision house.  She loved it when anyone came into the back yard and gave her company. Gypsy loved to eat, but most of all she loved being petted.  Gypsy was trained.  She could  sit and shake and jump up to hug an adult or squat and reach out with her paws to hug a little one.  Did I mention that we had a little one at our house?  Josh's daughter was born end of August, 1999, and Gypsy was her dog.  The two of them were practically the same age.  My son, 7 years Josh's junior loved the dog too, and when Josh and his new family found another place to live, Gypsy stayed with us and became Uncle Sonny's dog...and eventually Gypsy became our dog.

ARKANSAS

In 2007 my husband and son and I moved to retire in Arkansas.  I will never forget moving Gypsy to our new home.  We had a huge U-haul truck and I was going to drive our little SUV.  Our granddaughters' stepfather had loaned us a dog crate that we hoped would be big enough.  Our big tall friend Ranzy was there helping us to pack the truck.  He and my husband decided to put Gypsy into the crate and then see if they could lift the crate up and into the back of my vehicle.  That worked but the cage was so big it went from side to side in the car and there was not any way to open the door on the end of it without taking it back out again.  I felt so sorry for the dog I left right then, knowing that I had about a 7 hour drive to bring Gypsy to her new home.

Gypsy was a wonderful passenger.  I was a bundle of nerves trying to stop and start slowly so she would not be tossed around in her crate.  I talked to her constantly, and Gypsy never seemed to be bothered but I was a terrible mess.  I got all the way to Atlanta, Texas, more than half the trip before I realized that I needed to stop and get something to eat and stretch my legs.  Gypsy made no fuss at all...she just sat calmly in her cage while I went inside a McDonalds to use the bathroom and get some french fries and some water.  Back on the road again, I got to the welcome center in Arkansas just east of Texarkana and thought I would stop again and maybe let Gypsy out in the dog park there.  But, when I was parking, I saw Mike's big old truck and hurried to catch up with him instead of stopping.  When we got to our little town, about an hour later, Mike had to stop in Bismarck to get gas.  I drove on to our new house.  I don't know if Gypsy smelled that Sonny was there or how she knew, but for the first time since we left La Porte the dog who had been so awesomely patient began to try and move around in her cage and make whining noises.  As soon as I got to the house I went inside to get Sonny and he and I lifted the cage out of the back of the car and opened the door and you never saw any dog so happy, not so much to be out of her confinement, but she sure did seem happy to see Sonny again after not seeing him at all for about six weeks!

THE STORY DOESN'T STOP THERE

The next part of the story takes place about two months later.  Our house in Arkansas has a couple of acres of land that goes with it and it is surrounded by trees that stretch for miles behind us.  It was a really big place for a dog who'd known only the back yard of a subdivision house her whole 8 years of life.   Too, we were worried that if we let her run, Gypsy would scare someone (she looked so much like a wolf) and get herself shot.  We tied her up, but her leash was short and confining.  We got a swivel and a long chain and tied her up to that.  Gypsy did everything she could to get loose.  If we put her near a tree, she would run around and around the tree until she had no slack on her chain then throw herself against it trying to get it to break.  Every morning it was the same tangled chain story and every day we would try to figure out a way to give Gypsy some freedom without having her take off running to explore her new world on her own.  In the end, we decided to fence the yard, so we got some of those metal posts that you push into the ground and some of that wire that has the big 3" squares in it and fenced her a yard.  After that, Gypsy spent most of her time lying inside the yard, in fact, lying in front of the french doors outside our bedroom.  Never once did it occur to me that the dog could get out of that fence anytime she wanted.

In late fall, right after Halloween, Gypsy started howling lots more than ever before.  We ignored her or sprayed her with water and made her quit, but apparently although unnoticed by me, after not having done so for years, Gypsy had gone into season.  Two black labs, one old and the other young came to visit her.  The young one was so spry that he could leap over that fence, no problem.  And he did.  When I would walk out the back door, that black lab would be over that fence in a flash!  The old one didn't jump.  He'd go around the bottom of the fence, pushing on it until he found a place where he could push himself underneath.  He didn't run when I came outside, though.  He just didn't budge, no matter what I would do.  I could scream at him, threaten him, hit him, kick at him and all that old dog would do is stand and look at me.  He would not leave until I went back inside.  Once I'd see him leave see the spot where he got inside our fence so I could take out the slack. I never saw either dog hooked up with Gypsy, but Mike told me that he did.  And after a few days, the black Labs didn't come back any more and not long after that, we put in a chain link fence that was nearly six feet high with real posts and locking gates.

In March, the tv weatherman predicted snow.  Mike's brother had said to let him know when it was going to snow and he and his wife would come up to visit us.  When he and his wife got here, we had a great visit the first night, going to get Arkansas barbecue and visiting the bakery and buying wonderful desserts.  On Saturday we went to antique stores and again had a good time...and when we got home, the temperature started to drop.  Gypsy was a mess, crying and whining and trying her best go go under our back porch, digging a huge hole under there to get out of the wind.  We tried putting her on the porch, but she didn't stop whining and crying.  Finally we decided that since she had not ever seen snow before we would put her inside on the sun porch and block off her entry into the house.  All was quiet, and we slept thru the night and the snow came down and turned the whole world white.

The next morning when I got up, Mike's brother was already awake and had poured himself a cup of coffee.  When I got into the kitchen, he said to me, "I think I hear more than one voice out there on that sun porch.  When I checked, sure enough, Gypsy was guarding a little black puppy, no bigger than her own paw.  She seemed excited for me and everyone else to see what she had done. She kept licking it and muzzling next to it and practically showing it off when anyone came to check on her and her tiny offspring.  Thank goodness that dog only had one puppy...I read where a wolf could have a dozen puppies and a shepherd could have as many as sixteen!  Good night!!

The next day, again my brother in law was awake before me.  And when I went down to the kitchen, he told me that he thought there were two puppies.  What??!!  Impossible.  It was over 12 hours that we waited for Gypsy to be finished with her birthing and nothing happened and she didn't seem to be in labor any more.  But out on that back porch, Gypsy had two little black babies!

SATURDAY

SUNDAY

And that's the story about how today we have two black labs living in our back yard.  It isn't the whole story.  I haven't told you yet that Gypsy died last year at the age of 13.  (There is a blog about that, but the date on it is far back from this one.)  I haven't told you that we call the black dogs Red and Blue--which is another story.  At first we'd named them Saturday and Sunday, but we could hardly tell them apart they looked so much alike.  Mike got them collars when they were about six weeks old.  The collars were red and blue, so we put them onto the puppies and renamed the dogs Red and Blue.

GYPSY'S PUPPIES WERE MOVED OUTSIDE.  THEY ARE SEVEN WEEKS OLD.

RED AND BLUE AT 17 WEEKS OLD

GYPSY WITH RED AND BLUE AT 20 WEEKS OLD 

RED AND BLUE AND GYPSY IN THE WINTER SNOW OF 2009

I haven't said that we nicknamed them 'our dog alarm' because they bark and run from gate to gate when anyone so much as pauses at the far end of our driveway and they don't stop until we come out to greet our company.I didn't tell you that we can now tell the puppies apart, or that Blue is nearly blind or about how just like Gypsy their favorite thing even above eating is to be petted.  

Cheerleader Princess

Homecoming Week.Favorite Team Day

Cheerleader Zoey

Homecoming Week Crazy Hat Day

Homecoming Princess

Football season has arrived and my great granddaughter Zoey is taking a cheer class after school.  She loves it according to my granddaughter and really looks forward to class.  She does her cheers all the time whenever and where ever she can, in the car, in the yard, in her room, everywhere.  Zoey is from a small town in southeast Texas.  When the high school in her town has homecoming, everyone gets involved and when they elect a king and queen, they also choose a prince and princess.  This year, on September 7th, Zoey was the Homecoming Princess!

My father died.  I have not mentioned my father much in my blog, but he was always there, an important part of all of my life.  He was my Daddy.  Obituary of L.M.(Jack)Maggard will tell you about him...when he was born and who preceded him in death and who survives him.  Those things are history.  My thoughts about my Dad are like me, bits of history that breathe and have a heartbeat and life.

At the age of 93, my Dad lived a long and full lifetime and I was part of that life for over 66 years.  I love my Dad, and I will always know that he loved me.  Dad married the most remarkable woman and I always got to call her Mama.  My mother was one of those people who spoiled everyone and my Dad knew it and never objected.  He instead had a hand in the spoiling, tossed in with the teaching and the obvious pride The two of them were a couple in love and there was never any doubt about it.  Daddy and Mama gave me five siblings, four brothers and a sister.  We are all grown now and each of us has given them grandchildren and some of us, great grandchildren.  At his funeral services, when I had the chance to speak, I mentioned that we should not grieve, but rather we should celebrate my Dad's life.  One of the most noticeable things about my Dad was his sense of humor.  He laughed and joked about nearly everything and could see something to laugh at everywhere.  My mother and my sister and my daughter all preceded him in death and now those three have a fourth for pinochle.  When he'd call me on the phone, my dad would say, "Hello der" and when I called him he would say, "Howdy" and for just about every other situation, be it good or bad or just a spot where he didn't know what to say, he would say "Oh Boy"  I was with him when Daddy breathed his last.  He died in his own house, in his own bed, sleeping peacefully.  Dare I mention his snoring or would that just go to show I inherited his sense of humor?

These two are not just my great granddaughters, they're the greatest!!

June 21, 2013, Mike and I got up and packed and got on the road to Saratoga.  We got to Ashley's house about 4 o'clock...in time for me to get to see the new little Stella (5 1/2 months old) and collect bunches of hugs from Zoey (5).  What a long time it has been since I last saw Ashley and Chris and Zoey and that was the first visit I've ever had with Stella.  She is a doll of a baby!

 

Ashley and Chris are wonderful hosts.  Supper was terrific and the visiting was great!  In the evening I got to go with them to the final day of Zoey's Vacation Bible School and to see the closing ceremonies.  Those sweet Hiltons gave us their bed at night because Mike still has minor problems using his leg getung down on something low.  Their bed was wonderful, so tall I nearly needed a ladder to get up there myself and perfect for Mike, we had a great night's sleep.  The next day there was more visiting and us using Chris' phone (because ours didn't pick up a signal ) and arranging for Brandie and Debbie and Lucas and Myles to bring Chloe and Trinity to meet us and travel back to Arkansas to visit here for a couple of weeks.  First we went to the Subway at the Valero station because that's the road that goes back to Dayton....but when we called Brandie was far away then Ashley and Chris (with Zoey and Stella) came by us and stopped to tell us they were on the way to go out to eat Mexican food on that same highway, only about a block from Highway 59...so we called Brandie back and we all met at the Mexican Restaurant in Cleveland....and from there it was quick to get onto our road home...and only 6 hours later...back to Bismarck.

Freezing Rain
Yesterday was a beautiful day....warm, in the 60's with the sun shining brightly.  That's a very good thing too because on Monday (Feb. 19, 2013) the house "next" door, the big white house behind the church was demolished in a wind anomoly: News Flash: is a link to our local news on the day of the storm..  All of us here, Mike and Mike2 and me watched the wind pass by our house.  It was really strong.  Mike, who is on crutches still from his broken leg six weeks ago was just getting ready to take a shower.  He changed his mind when the wind started whipping up outside and made his way toward the livingroom.  Sonny and I were in the kitchen talking about how dark it just had gotten outside when the noise started...and we talked briefly about whether or not the sound was hail...but the strong winds were short lived and by the time Mike got here and Sonny and I finished our conversation, the little storm was gone.  The clock on the oven said 2:46.  Our electricity blinked off and looking out the kitchen window I could see that outside, a lot of branches were down and the back yard full of debris.  Without electricity, we could not finish cooking dinner...meatloaf and baked potatoes--since the power was not immediately restored.  We left the supper in the oven and the cupcakes Sonny had been making stayed on the counter waiting until we would be able to use the oven again,

Outside, cardboard and branches had blown into the woods from off the burn pile.  The guttering that Gary removed from the house to make the repairs after our snow storm disappeared from my view because it had blown across the yard.  I didn't see that the chicken cage had blown end over end , but one of the chickens got out and came into the garage...which caused me to notice.  I had put the chickens up into the coop earlier because it looked like rain and I didn't want to have to go out and get wet if it was still raining when it was time to put them up later.  When I got outside I realized that the coop was overturned, the nests upside down and that the other two chickens were still inside unable to figure out how to get out.  I don't know how the third chicken got out and into the garage.  Maybe she blew. I have not heard yet whether it was actually a tornado or if it was a sustained wind gust that blew up in our yard and across behind the church and obviously to the Thornton's house behind. While Sonny and I were outside uprighting the chicken's coop, Cynthia, our insurance agent, pulled up into the yard and said, "I heard on the scanner that the house next to Hickory Grove Baptist Church was deomolished and thought that it was you, but everything looks fine here."

That's when we walked over to the edge of the yard and saw that the house to the East behind the church was completely toppled.  We walked over to the church and were told that everyone was out of the house...five or six people and that only one was hurt, a son-in-law who'd been in the shower one minute then found himself outside in the yard the next.  An ambulance came and took him to the hospital in Hot Springs.  Our electricity didn't come back on.  Entergy said that they hoped to get it back on by 7 in the evening...but when I called at 7 they said it would be two a.m.  We decided that we would start up our gasoline generator so we could have a light and the tv.  Sonny lit a fire in the fireplace so it was warm even though the temperature dropped to nearly freezing in the night.  When I called at midnight they said the lights would not be back on until 5 a.m.  The power was finally restored the next morning a little after 5am.  Finally we could finish baking the cupcakes!

Lots of the people who live in Bismarck came to help on Monday and again yesterday.  I hope the Thornton family we able to save their belongings!  Today little clean up would be possible.  It's too cold and wet.  It's freezing, and raining with some sleet in the rain and the spitting raindrops freeze as soon as they hit the ground.  Icy.  I went out and put the chickens up in their coop and covered part of it hoping it helps them to keep warm and out of the wind.  I fed them and fed the dogs and brought the cat in.  I drove to Bismarck and got milk and bread in case tomorrow we are not able to get out on the highway.  The daffodils are blooming outside along my back fence and I imagine that they will die back some from the cold.  So will the camelias blooming on the bush outside my kitchen window.  I hope the peach tree and pear tree survive all right and I am glad I did not plant my garden outside yet.

Zoey celebrated her 5th birthday on February 15, 2013

Mike and I went to Little Rock for his last doctor's appointment on the 25th of last month.  The first thing they did was remove his cast...then he had x-rays taken so that when we saw Dr. Nicholas he finished removing the staples from Mike's scar, checked the x-rays and the surgery and told him that he was making exemplary progress, then sent him him with just his knee brace, no cast and told him he would not need to return for a couple of months.  His next appointment is set for March...after the Pipeline Reunion in Shreveport that I am planning to go to (March 7-9) hoping to see my Dad and several of my brothers and their families.  I will make a definite plan about that later.  Mike is still progressing nicely from his broken leg. He is not supposed to bend it or put weight on it because the Doctor said that he needs more time to heal and for his bones to knit a bridge.  He has been going wherever he wants on his crutches, but I don't really think he will want to go to Shreveport to the Diamond Jack casino there.  We'll see.  Today when I went to get milk in Bismarck he offered to go...and said he would drive!

It takes a really long time for a broken bone to heal

Yesterday (Friday, January 19) Mike and I traveled to Little Rock to see Doctor Nicolas at UAMS.  He didn't do much more than unwrap the surgery so he could have a look at it.  He removed about every other staple in the foot long scar Mike has down the front of his leg, rewrapped the knee in the same old splint that Mike came in with and told him he needs to come back next Friday again to have the rest of the staples removed.

Today, Gary came to replace the gutters along the back side of the house.  Mike has had to stay in bed, so Sonny and I are here to help as much as we can.  We made frankengutter using a lot of the old pieces and all of the new pieces Mike had gotten the day before he broke his leg and if I say so myself, it looks pretty good and I think it will withstand a pretty big snow sliding off the roof if we have any more of that this winter.

Meanwhile I am busy catching up with the bills and the phone calls and the things I've left undone.  Mike is getting a little better every day.  A home health evaluator called Friday morning while we were leaving for Little Rock and told me that the physical therapist who would be taking Mike's case had the flu.  I think the evaluator is going to come out to visit us on Monday, but maybe she is just going to call Monday to talk about when she can make an appointment.  Mike is able to get out of bed and walk to the bathroom and is much better at picking his heavy leg with the fiberglass splint on it using his other leg to lift.  Ten days down and another thirty or so days to go.

Mike's niece Crystal and his brother Danny have been wonderful about calling Mike regularly to help take his mind off his healing process.  I am a mess myself, my mind keeps wandering.  I sometimes think about how many birthdays there are to celebrate at the end of January.  My niece Katie will be three  on the 22nd.  My youngest brother Bryan's birthday is on the 25th, my grandson Craig celebrates his 24th birthday on the 27th of January and my nephew Gary has his birthday on the 28th.

All those birthdays help to make me think about other things than that my daughter Eva will have been gone for a year on the very last day of this month.  I think I have prepared myself for the sad thoughts about Eva's death, but when I least expect it my thoughts are all of her and how sad it all is.  Eva's father was adopted and never knew his birth parents.  His adoptive mother and father are both deceased and although they adopted an older son, Eva was never able to find her uncle again after her grandmother died.  She always remembered that her maiden name was Miers, but now that she is gone, it looks as if the name Miers went with her.  I gave her all the things I had from my first marriage for her to remember her father and her grandmother and I don't know where any of that is now.  I do understand now, why Eva was so insistent that her father be remembered....for without Eva to keep his memory, he would be gone.  Eva left behind two wonderful children, both of whom are parents.  She had a granddaughter and a grandson when she died and a few weeks ago another granddaughter was born--a most beautiful baby girl that I know Eva would have loved and held and cuddled the same way she did her first granddaughter 4 years ago and the same way she held and loved her grandson three years ago.  The thought brings a smile to my face.  I am the great grandmother and I love Eva's children and their spouses and her grandchildren.  Now I understand why Eva did her best to keep her father's memory alive  and I will keep Eva's memory alive for all of my own life the same way!

Tonight after Gary finished working, Sonny was too tired to cook supper and he told me how to make his meatloaf.  I put a couple tablespoons of chicken bullion powder and a little water, two eggs, two thirds of a cup of oatmeal and about a pound and a half of hamburger in a bowl, mixed it thoroughly with my hands then  filled the 12 cups of a rubber muffin pan with the meat (the middle ones had the least meat because Sonny says they don't cook as quickly as the outside cups), put the muffin pan into the oven at 375 degrees for ten minutes. I made a glaze--of a tablespoon of brown sugar, a couple teaspoons of ginger and a quarter cup of ketchup and when the ten minutes was up I glazed 8 of the little meat loaves.  I left the glaze off of mine since I don't eat sugar.  Back into the oven for another 18 minutes, I set a timer and started some macaroni and cheese to make a meal.  (Then I started writing this blog...and it's time for me to go finish supper now!)

Say No to Ice Skating and Break Dancing!!

My husband Mike fell on the ice a week ago Saturday, January 5.   It snowed on Christmas Day and on the day after, more snow fell so that in all we got about ten inches.  For several days after that, the snow melted some in the daytime, but at night the temperature would fall below freezing and the next day there would still be snow.  After nearly a week the snow finally melted enough to start sliding off the roof, huge chunks of it that made it look like it had recently snowed the way it piled up beside the house.  On the day that Mike got hurt Gary, the man who comes to work here when something calls for an extra set of hands or some special knowledge, came to help us repair the damage to the gutters that the heavy snow had caused pulling them down and breaking some of them.  Gary was the one who came inside to tell me that Mike had fallen and that he might have broken his leg.  Things have gone double time around here for me ever since.

Mike was sitting up right on the front cement walkway with his leg across the pile of frozen snow.  I brought him his knee brace and crutches that he asked for trying his best to get up, but none of it worked so I came inside and dialed 911.  I tried calling his doctor in Malvern and his surgeon in Little Rock and even the emergency room at the hospital, but none of them had any suggestions for me.  The emergency crew who came to help Mike from off the front sidewalk first slid a plastic stretcher underneath him, then slid the stretcher onto a gurney, all of it heavy duty work because the ground outside was uneven and slanted and there was little room to do much of anything in the tiny space of the cement walkway between the garage and the hedges.  Once inside, the ambulance driver told me she was going to take him to St. Joseph/Baptist Hospital in Hot Springs.  I had never been there before, but I followed the ambulance all the way there.  The trauma crew checked Mike in, put him onto a bed and he waited for the Doctor to come and order xrays and something for his pain.  It was a couple of hours before the doctor came and when he did, he turned out to be a very young resident who had no experience at all in orthopedics.  He ordered and looked at the X-rays of Mike's knee and upper calf then in another couple of hours came back to the room to ask Mike if he felt better and could walk.  He said he didn't see any kind of break on the pictures of Mike's knee and said Mike should go home and keep the knee propped up and take pain killers and that the knee would most likely be better the next day.  It was tough getting Mike back home again.  The hospital gave him some kind of delauden to kill the pain for the twenty mile trip and it took a lot of time for him to go inside, slowly sliding out of the car then hobbling on a walker and crutches into the garage, across the six feet, up the high step into the house.  Sonny was here to help and he and I brought Mike's wheeled office chair from the computer room and pushed him across the expanse of the livingroom but Mike had to negotiate the three steps up into the bedroom hall all by himself, one tiny movement at a time.  From there it was still not easy going down the hall and across the bedroom and it was not any small task getting up onto the bed without moving the knee but Mike told Sonny and I what to do and we managed.

It was a long wait until Monday,  The trauma Doctor had said to call and speak to an orthopedist, so on  early as possible Mike called to see when he would be able to get in and see Doctor Nicholas at UAMS, the surgeon who had treated him two years ago when he'd had the Giant Cell Tumor at the top of his fibula. At first Mike had an appointment for Friday, 5 days away, but throughout the day he talked to the nurses at UAMS until finally he asked me if I would be able to take him in right then so the doctor could see him that afternoon before three.  It was a long trip to Little Rock, the biggest part of it being the walk across the house, down the three steps into the living area and the one big step down into the garage.  After that, pushing and pulling himself up into the back seat of the car must have seemed like a piece of cake and when we got to UAMS there was a wheel chair and a technician waiting to take him into the hospital itself.  

First we went to radiology for xrays then we went to the 7th floor clinic to see Doctor Nicholas, with half an hour to spare before the 3 o'clock deadline.  Dr. Nicholas showed us on the xrays that Mike did indeed have a break in his fibula and a tear in some tissue that needed repair.  He said that he could not do the surgery until Wednesday but that he would check Mike into the hospital to stay off his leg and not bend his knee or do any more damage before the surgery that would be first thing in the morning on Wednesday.  He introduced the resident surgeon, Dr. Dooley.  Since Mike was only in the hospital so he could stay off his leg, the time before surgery was easy with nothing to be done but to watch tv and play on the computer tablet.  I spent the night Monday because it was dark before we were finished checking Mike into his hospital room and it's a long way to drive home.  On Tuesday, though, I decided to drive back to Bismarck and do the things I had not been able to do before I left and get ready for what I knew might be a long time gone if Mike's surgery the next day didn't go as planned.  I went home via Hot Springs so I could fill up with gas at a familiar place and so I could get a couple of prescriptions filled for Sonny (who'd been to the doctor the Thursday before in Amity) and stock up on milk and eggs so Sonny would have provisions if I was gone for a long time.  That night I showered in my very own shower and slept in my very own bed.  I'd talked to Mike on the phone and he'd warned me that the weather was going to be bad on Wednesday, so I left as soon as it got daylight hoping to be back in Little Rock in time for Mike's nine thirty surgery.  I did get there a little after nine, but when I got to his room Mike was gone.  I hurried down to the 2nd floor but Mike had already gone into the surgery rooms.  I missed him completely, but I checked in at the desk and waited until about noon when Doctor Nicholas came to talk to me and tell me that the surgery had gone fine.  (They talked about replacing Mike's knee, but they repaired the bone break and tissue damage instead using metal rods in the top of the bone and cement and sutures to put it all back in place to heal.)  Mike got out of recovery and back into his room a little after four.  And then it was a night of him being groggy or asleep and me watching tv or using my laptop.  Thursday was a day of Mike in pain.  There was not so much groaning as one might have expected though and several of Mike's family and friends called to talk to him.  The hospital is very efficient and comfortable and everyone who works there is very nice.  When the doctors made their rounds on Thursday they told Mike that he could go home as soon as he was ready.  On Friday they made arrangements for him to check out and about noon we headed for home.  Again it was a chore to take Mike from the car thru the garage, across the living area, up the stairs and down the hall into his bed. 

Now, all is well.  Mike is resting peacefully or awake watching tv or using his tablet, taking as little pain medication as he can and exercising, flexing his calf muscles and wiggling his toes and occassionally standing up beside his bed using his crutches and strengthening his good leg so it will hold all his weight.  I am still on double time having to take over some of his chores along with my own.  Thank goodness for Sonny who has taken on the rest of Mike's chores.  He has been wonderful cooking the three squares a day Mike needs to get back on his feet.  I think we will be going back to see Doctor Nicholas in Little Rock next Friday.  Meanwhile, on Monday a home health physical therapist should be coming to visit to make recommendations about what Mike might need.  There's nothing else to say about it all except ....get well soon, Mike.

A New Years Post...
I wrote this post as 2012 was drawing to a close.  It was hard for me, looking back, not to dwell on the sadness and pain and grief that came during the year, so this final entry took a long time for me to finish.

In 2012, I faced a parent's greatest nightmare, the worst fear of them all.  On the final day of January, the only daughter I birthed, Eva, died at the age of 44.  My grief has not ended. I miss Eva in my life. 

In October of 2012, my friend, my husband's mother, Norma Becknell died. My mother in law and I saw one another regularly for 30 years, from 1982 when her youngest son brought me home to meet his parents until the day of her death. We enjoyed coffee, garage sales, her husband Gadget (who died in 1996), their "full of personality" dogs, their wonderful friends and family, both new and old.  I liked Norma's artwork and portraits.  We had fun making beds and cleaning and cooking together.  The smallest things brought laughter and joys.  Together!.  After years of smoking together, we quit together.  Always through the years, we chatted together, we shopped together, and together we had a great time. Norma will always be a blessing to me.  I miss her in my life.

Last Thanksgiving I wrote the following--I am thankful for my children.  I will always wish that my daughter and my son had a better, fuller life, that they’d been able to travel more widely and meet more people and that they’d been exposed to more ways of doing things and seen more of life….but my best wishes for my daughter and my son are just one more way that I know I am thankful for them both.  I am thankful that my daughter, although she is an adult with a family and friends and problems and joys of her own, she stops sometimes and tells her mother that she loves her.  She doesn’t forget me.  I am thankful that my son although he is an adult, helps out with things that need to be done, cooks deliciously, steps in to lend a hand when things are too heavy or too much hard work, occupies himself without looking to me or my husband to keep him from being bored living in the country with no place to go…and he, too stops sometimes to tell his mother that he loves her.  

I would have to make changes to the note above.  My daughter died January 31, 2012.  I am thankful that I knew Eva from the moment of her birth until the time of her death, all  44 years of her life.  For her, I still grieve.  For her I always wished a wonderful life full of travel and people and ways of doing things and seeing things that would make her life one of blessings and joys.  May my daughter Eva now rest in peace.   As an adult with a family and friends and problems and joys of her own Eva always stopped to include me in her life and she always stopped to tell her mother that she loved her and that she hadn't forgotten me.  I am thankful for all the times we were together and will never forget a single one.  Sometimes my son and I talk and he tells me that he misses having Eva in his life.  It has been tearful for me to see and talk to my grandchildren, but I am thankful to know them both, parents today, I'm delighted to see Eva mirrored and see how she has given some of the best parts of herself to her children and in her grandchildren!

More about the old year

In the winter months of 2012, it never snowed.  It was very cold in the spring so I was late to put my winter garden plants into the ground.  We got baby chicks, but it was so cold for them that I worried how they would fare.  Spring came then after everything was covered in tiny green buds the weather froze one last time.  Our property taxes fell due and I hadn't saved enough money to pay them.  The price of gas was so high we stopped most of our traveling.  We stopped eating out.  I occupied much of my time looking for coupons and discounts and rearranging our spending habits, saving for the next taxes and insurance that would fall due.  Our stock market investment share value fell from a few dollars to a few cents and my IRA lost its worth.  In the summer months it was very hot and very dry.  There was no rain for long stretches and my garden simply burned up.  My electricity bill stayed healthy though, and my water bill.  I caught the flu Thanksgiving and was abed for a week before I went to the doctor to find out that the flu had evolved into pneumonia and that Mike, too had the flu.  The year ended with stormy weather and loss of electricity for long periods of time.  The world didn't end as predicted on December 21.

There were, however, in 2012 many pluses!  The chicks were fine and healthy.  In spite of my worries they grew up and started laying eggs before the summer was over! I enjoyed being a grandmother when Chloe and Trinity came and visited us for a couple of weeks in the summer.  My niece Crystal came and spent the night with us and brought her husband Mike and Alley, her teenage daughter.  In August I went to the Nagel Family Reunion held at the resort next door to my brother Doyle's farm in Gainsville, Texas.  Nagel is the last name of my maternal grandparents, my mother's parents.  I enjoyed seeing my Aunt and my Uncle who are still living and cousins and and their children and grandchildren.  I saw some of my forever friends, some cousins I had not seen in a long time,  and some cousins for the first time. My daughter Dawn came to visit for Thanksgiving and brought her son who is just learning to drive and her daughter who is in preschool.  The springtime was welcomed and was beautiful.  The summer included swimming and exploring.  The fall was a wall of vibrant color and brought holidays and love.  December brought Christmas and reminded me once more that my daughter was a wonderful person.  She was one of those people who, no matter how far away in time or distance was someone she called friend, she always remembered to let them know she loved them.  My mailbox was full to the brim with cards and letters from my own family and friends and also good wishes and hugs from those who loved and missed my daughter, sharing their own Christmas with me.  The world didn't end as predicted on December 21.

The New Year came in quietly.  Mike was asleep and Mike2 and I had only beer to make a toast with.  The neighbors shot few fireworks, so when  Mike2 found some old bottle rockets, we shot two of them into the sky and we each said "Happy New Year".  Welcome 2013! I will always remember 2012, but as the year draws to a close, I know that my memories will be full of both laughter and sadness...bittersweet.

It was a wonderful Thanksgiving....Mike's daughter came to visit with her sixteen year old son and her 4 year old daughter.  We had deep fried turkey with all the trimmings.  I made cornbread so we had cornbread dressing and rice dressing both.  I visited with my grandkids on Wednesday night and all day on Thursday, but on Thursday night I felt sick, feverish and achy and lots and lots of coughing and coughing and coughing all night long.  I felt so bad I didn't get up out of bed on Friday and so my daughter and her kiddos left for home that next evening.  I don't even remember Friday, or Saturday, or Sunday, and I barely remember Monday.  I had thought that by Monday if what I had was the flu I would be feeling better after five days of not much besides sleep to keep me going.  But Monday was no different, and neither was Tuesday.  Mike got sick on Monday...and so both of us were down.  Thank goodness for Sonny who cooked and fed us because Mike and I were both too week and dizzy and feverish to stay out of bed for long.  On Wednesday Mike and I felt good enough to go to the doctor.  He checked us both for the flu and said that Mike did indeed have the flu and put him on an antiviral.  He said that I was over all my flu symptoms and was not contagious...but I have pneumonia.  Since then I have slept a lot, have been eating light and drinking lots of fluids and taking my antibiotic every day the way the doctor ordered.  Tonight (It is December 2nd, Sunday night) I have eaten my dinner, taken my medication and feel like I am better today, still awake after being out of bed for a few hours.  Tomorrow should be even better!  I have three days of antibiotic left to take.

My husband's mother passed away unexpectedly, last week. He and I and our son made a rush trip to Lafayette, Louisiana for the funeral. My son said he doesn't want to go back to Louisiana again if it will always be for a funeral. My niece wrote the following obituary:

"Funeral services were held Friday, October 19, 2012 at 10:30 a.m. at Evangeline Memorial Gardens Chapel in Carencro for Norma D. Becknell, age 86, the former Norma D. Currie, who passed away Tuesday, October 16, 2012 at Lafayette General Medical Center in Lafayette. Interment in Evangeline Memorial Gardens in Carencro. The family held visiting hours from 4:00 p.m. until 9:00 p.m. Thursday and on Friday from 8:00 a.m. until the time of the service. Melancon Funeral Home, Evangeline Memorial Gardens Chapel, 4117 North University Avenue, was in charge of arrangements. Pastor Chad Thibodeaux, pastor of Vatican Baptist Church of Vatican, officiated at the services.

Mrs. Becknell was a native of Jackson, Mississippi and a resident of Carencro since 1994. She was a member of Missionary Baptist Church in Many, LA. She enjoyed spending time with family and friends, and she loved her dogs. Norma was a strong spirited independent woman who will be deeply missed.

Survivors include two sons, Daniel Brewer and his wife, Pam, of Lafayette and Mike Brewer and his wife, Myra, of Bismarck, Arkansas; two daughters, Rhonda Darrell Trahan and her husband, Cecil, of Lafayette, Deanne Becknell Hallam and her husband, Billy of Jasper, Texas; one brother, H.C. "Jack" Cooper and his wife, Minnie, of Coushatta; one sister, Betty Huston, of Boise, Idaho; and eleven grandchildren, Crystal Snider and her husband, Mike, Jenny Shelton her husband, Colt, Erica Miller and her husband, Darrel, and Laura Brewer all of Carencro, Tess Blanchard, Josh Brewer, Allison Reed, and J.W. Rourk all of Lafayette, Sonny Brewer of Bismarck, Arkansas, Roni Becknell Sadler of Fort Worth, Texas, and James "Beau" Fisher of San Marcos, Texas. Ten great grandchildren, Ashley Hilton, Anthony "Craig" Baldi, Allison Jacob, Grant Arceneaux, Chloe Brewer, Trinity Brewer, Lexi Clifton, Logan Clifton, Molly Reed, and Andrew Grettner. Two great-great grandchildren Zoey Hilton, Anthony Craig Baldi, Jr. Long time caregiver and special friend Angela Boutin as well as a host of nieces, nephews and friends.

She was preceded in death by her husband, Lynn "Gadget" Becknell; her parents, S.D. Currie and the former Mabel Du Pree' both of Magee Mississippi; two sons, Ronald Bruce Becknell and Ronald Brewer; granddaughter Eva Baldi and one sister, Myrtice Anderson.

The following are some heartfelt notes to show how much Norma (Nomo to her grandkids) was loved...

Allison Brewer Reed
Norma Becknell 1926 - 2012
The last of my remaining grandparents passed away today. She was one tough old bitch. There is no doubt in my mind where I get my stubborn pigheadedness, and fire filled zest for life. RIP Nomo.

Crystal Snider
I lost a piece of my heart today as I watched my grandmother take her last breath. The love I hold for you will be eternal, I will be strong just as you always were, I will always carry your memory, as well as all the time we shared, and when it is my time to leave this earth I know you will be by my side to welcome me - or fuss and ask me what took so long. I love you, always, and like I said earlier you are a big part of my "everything" I love you nomo

Alley Jacob
Today, My family and I mourn due to the loss of a person we held close to our hearts, Nomo. She was a terrific person, and she definitely made her mark in our lives. While reminiscing,please remember, "Time doesn't fly, It makes memories." What matters is each moment she spent with us was treasured, not how long ago it was. She touched our hearts at some point, and for that she will never be forgotten. We love and miss you so much, Nomo. Rest in Peace. ♥

Laura Brewer
We gained a new angel this afternoon. Nomo you will be missed by many. We all loved you very much. Thank you for everything you have taught me over the years. I'll love you forever and you will never be forgotten. I have already started telling Andrew about all of our memories together. Give pa hugs and kisses for all of us!

Deanna Becknell Hallam
I went to visit my stepmom in Lafayette Friday, and I am so thankful for that visit because today she passed on. She went home....and I am sure my father was waiting for her with open arms. She was my mother for 40 years, and she helped me through some very tough times. She was a loving lady that was never afraid to give you a kick if you needed it.....I loved her very much. Very much

Jennifer Shelton

RIP Norma "Nomo" Becknell she was fiery and tough and definitely had more strength than anyone in this world... I love u Nomo always and when u get to those pearly gates give pa gadget uncle Ronnie and big momma lots of love from all of us... Miss u already :(

Myra Maggard Brewer
Sad news today as Mike's mother Norma Becknell died about noon. Rest in Peace, Nomo! We all love you and you will always live on in our memories. It has always been a treasure to know you!

Crystal Snider (October 17, 2012)
Today will be the first day I face without you, I find comfort in knowing that you are in peace, but find a void within myself from the moment you left. Every ounce of my soul misses you. I am lost. God grant me strength.

Crystal Snider (Friday, October 19, 2012)
My grandmothers service touched my heart, i had only intended to give her the send off that she was worthy of. Not only did I feel that was accomplished, but both sides of my family came out and supported and comforted one another, my friends and Hulco family showed me love and support. I don't know what the future will hold, I know that I'll have to adjust to life without her, which will be hard, this morning when I left my house I passed up the funeral home and found myself getting ready to go to her house, as if my heart was on autopilot. Checking in on her had become second nature, so that will be a hard habit to break. I love you nomo.

Jennifer Shelton (Friday October 19, 2012)
My NoMo's funeral was beautiful My big sister did such an amazing job I'm so proud of her :-) and thank u uncle mark for all of ur help and thank u for all of my wonderful family and friends getting together and helping each other through this hard time... Nomo u will be missed sorely as we love u do much... I will cherish always every moment and memory we shared and every lesson u taught me I love u Nomo may u rest in peace and watch over all of us always

Laura Brewer (Friday October 19, 2012)
Today was heart breaking! I want to take this time to thank everyone for their love, support, and prayers for my family and I. A special thank you to Katie for taking care of little man today. Rest in peace Nomo. Don't forget to keep an eye on all of us. —

Mike Brewer
As heavy as my heart was to watch my Mother's funeral today, I was glad to be surrounded with so many friends, and family that knew and loved her. A very special thanks to my niece Crystal who stayed with my Mother, her Grandmother, through these last few weeks and put together a beautiful service that I am sure would of made my mother smile. For years it was Crystal and her Mother that helped my Mother stay self sufficient and words can never express how much I appreciated being able to know they were there to check on her, bring her food, and lend any help they could. My Mother was not big on public signs of emotion, but I know how much she appreciated them being a daily part of her life. We should all be so lucky to have such caring people around us in times of need.

The 2012 Nagel Family Reunion was held in Gainsville, Texas on August 10, 11, 12 at the Lone Oak Ranch Retreat and hosted by Doyle and Brenda Maggard.  I was there and got to see and visit with many, many of the Nagel family who came to enjoy the festivities. I am a Nagel.  Nagel was my Mother Jane Maggard's maiden name.  Henry and Anna Nagel were my grandparents.  I need to make a list of everyone in my huge family so I don't leave anyone out.  I know from Uncle Eilert's family that Steve brought much of his family and that Rollie and Cinda and husband Mike Becker were there.  I know from my Uncle Herb's family was Kim and husband Mike Brace and daughters Allison and Sara and Kim's granddaughters. Many of my mother Jane's family were there.  Uncle Bud and his daughter Rhonda were there.  From my Aunt Verna's family Bruce and Sue Trost came and I sat next to Denise Hole and her son James in church.  Also from Aunt Verna and Uncle Carl's family was Sandy and husband Gailyn Boeschling.  My Aunt Dorothy and husband Bob Evans was there and Dorothy's three daughters, Janet Sammons, Chris Blackwell and husband Joe and Cynthia Logan.

My son (...whose real name is Robert Michael but who goes by the name of Mike--which is also the name that my husband goes by, so to differentiate, I often say Mike2--except among family.) whose childhood nickname is "Sonny" and I drove to Trophy Club, Texas early (on Monday, August 6) because we wanted

Robert Michael Timothy Lee Brewer, is it any wonder they all call him Sonny!?!

to visit with my dad and my brother Gary and his wife, Judy from Delaware.  They'd arrived at my Dad's house, the last stop on their summertime 'trek' out to California (to see their new granddaughter Amelia for the first time and their sons Danny and Gary and their wives and children) and would be staying at my Dad's house until after the 2012 Nagel Family Reunion.  My Dad  is 92, and will celebrate his 93rd birthday this year.  My older

L.M. "Jack" Maggard was born November 19, 1919

Gary Maggard's birthday is June 12

Charla holding Amelia while Isabel does her own thing.

brother Gary was born in 1942.  Gary and his wife, Judy live in Bear Delaware close to his daughter Tammy Benbrook and her husband David.  They have two grandsons there, too, named Darrel (19) and Kyle (15).  They were not able to come to this year's Nagel Reunion and neither were Gary's son Gary (nor, wife, Stacy and sons David, Brandon, Noah and Luke) or son Danny (wife Sarah and  4 year old twins Kyler and Kaylin)  But Son Justin with his new wife Val were there and so was daughter Charla Alino with her husband Ignacio and daughters Isabel (2) and Amelia (about 1/3 of a year old).  

Gary Bonar and Gary Maggard

My older sister Marjean (born in 1944 and died in 1993) had children there including her son Gary Bonar with his son Andrew.  Marjean's daughter is named Jana, and her husband is Jeff  Sciba and they have sons Ethan (17) and Austin (8) and a daughter Abbigayle Jane (6).  as well as son Jack Bonar with his wife Amy and daughters Katy (16) and Emma (11).  I am the middle child with two older siblings and three younger ones.  My brother Doyle is 3 years my junior.  He and his wife Brenda hosted the reunion at the Lone Oak Ranch Retreat next door to his farm.  They finished building their 'farmhouse' and moved into it before New Years of 2012.  A big part of the fun at the reunion was visiting the farm and taking a tour of their beautiful house.  There was a huge water cooler blowing onto the patio outside making it almost pleasant to sit in the 

The water cooled patio overlooks the barns, pond and pastures.  Sitting outside are (left) Dorothy Evans, Kim Brace, Allison Bush, Sara Batchelder, Mike Brace, Stan Maggard, Jason Helal and Jack Maggard

hundred degree heat and visit comfortably!  Down at the barns there were chickens and horses and a donkey to see.  Lots of people were going down to the pond and fishing from the dock there.  Absolutely nothing was missing!  Doyle's son Kenny lives closeby and was able to be at the reunion all 3 days.  I grabbed the chance to visit with him and I know Sonny did too because Kenny is one of our favorite people!  Anne Helal and her husband Jason were there and I got a nice visit with her and her mother Brenda at the same time!  Anne and Brenda and my deceased daughter were close and it is pleasant to see what wonderful people Eva was close to.  I recognized Jason's singing in church and didn't resist telling him after the service what a beautiful voice he has. Anne and Jason's children Jordan, Logan and Alexis grew up so much since the last time I saw them I had a hard time not to say so.  Jordan spent some time entertaining the family with his guitar and singing.  Logan was the perfect gentleman and Alexis was taller than me, but still a youngster, I could tell, by the fact that she was everywhere and had energy that I'd love for her to share with me!  

Kim Brace said something that made Stan's crew all laugh!  That's Tammy Nagel in the left hand corner and all smiles are Derek Maggard, Jason and Chelsea Gould and Conni Maggard

Stan Maggard

My brother, ten years younger, Stan and his wife Conni were there, with son Derek and daughter Chelsea Gould and her husband Jason. They stayed up late to watch the meteor shower and whenever you'd look for Jason or Chelsea they were looking at bugs so you know they had a good time!  Stan's oldest son Jake was there with his wife Carrie and daughter Lauren (11) and son Brennan (8) and new baby boy (9 mos).  My 

Alex is teaching Blake the ropes to mobility!

brother twenty years younger, Bryan and his wife Denise were there with their two little ones Alex and Katy Jane.  Bryan loves to fish, so much of the time there was someone fishing at the dock who knew where everything was, and Alex knows his way around not just the fishing dock, but the whole farm, and the house too.  He got a chance to visit with everyone because all us adults were standing in line to hear what he had to say.  Katy Jane is quieter, but she was dressed cute as a button, adorable in her different hats and when she talked to me she was as full of questions as Alex used to be, so when she gets older there might be two or three who can answer every question.  Sometimes Doyle doesn't know and says "ask Brenda" or Brenda doesn't know and says "ask Doyle" but it didn't take me long to figure out the thing to do was to 'ask Alex!'  

Doyle Maggard

The Retreat was included a hotel and western style houses, a Dance Hall and Barroom an eating place and  outside I saw a swimming pool and a petting zoo and a church.  We all broke bread together on Saturday at a noonday meal and Saturday night before nature sent the Leonides meteor shower there was a wagon ride that traveled along the perimeter of the entire ranch, through the woods and swamps, over the bridge, down by the cows and the horses and (at one point you could look out and see Doyle's huge house and all his barns and the fishing pond) and ended up on the road in front of the hotel where everyone was sitting outside at the tables, past the swimming pool and back where it started at the Cafe in front of the yellow and white cottage where Steve Nagel and his family were staying.  And everyone got a chance to ride before it got dark enough to light the bonfire.  Another good time!  I started out sitting on a log next to my Uncle Bud (who will be 88 on August 19) and his daughter Rhonda and ended up sitting on a different log next to my Dad and Allison Bush and Sara Batchelder who were being served roasted marshmallows by Denise Hole (Aunt Verna's son Bruce's daughter) 's son James because Sara liked them burnt and they kept catching fire.  I laughed and loved it all and was worn out still wanting to stay longer when it was time to go back and take a shower and tumble into my bed.  

Bud Nagel and Bruce Trost

Henry Nagel's family includes Evans, Logans, Beckers, Blackwells, Boeschlings as well as Nagels.

With the church as a backdrop, Mike Brace looks on while Steve and Elsie greet family including Dorothy Evans and daughter Cynthia Logan.  (That's Rollie Nagel who's almost out of the picture!)

On Sunday there was a church service.  The non-denominational congregation that is building the church up the road held a complete service for us and welcomed all us Nagel family in to sing the praises of the Lord.  The sermon was exactly the right thing to say to so many of us there.  It started out with us reading bible verses where our savior tells us not to fret or worry because worrying never helps and it could harm.  The sermon went on to tell us to be patient and never to lose our faith.  Put it into the hands of the Lord with prayer and the right results will follow even though sometimes we can't see it coming or we can only see it when we look back and realize that things could have gone differently.  It was altogether beautiful and moving and the perfect end to a perfect family reunion.

Brenda Maggard chats with Sandy and Gailyn Boeschling

My cousin Cynthia and me!

Dorothy Evans with daughters Janet Sammons, Cynthia Logan and Christine Blackwell

This beautiful view provided by the livingroom windows of Brenda and Doyle's house crosses the patio with it's umbrella tables and flows down to the pond and the barns and across the whole of the farm!

Photo taken in our yard on April 27...Mike finished building his chicken tractor and the chicks seem to be very happy in their new home.  Our garden is growing and the broccoli is ready to cut, steam and serve for diner.  Our trellis roses are in bloom and the lawn is ready to be mowed.

The chicks are almost big enough to be called chickens!

Today is Crystal's birthday.  I've known my niece for most of the birthdays that's she's had in her life.  The reason I am talking about her today is that she was here visiting this morning when I woke and now I am waiting to know for sure that she is back at home safe and sound.  She and her husband and daughter should be getting to their house any time now.  They came to visit yesterday and last night went to a concert in Little Rock to see Regina Spektor.  ( Hero-Regina Spektor ) It was a long drive for them, and it was the first time they have come to visit us.  Today, leaving, they all said they would be back so I think they like driving a little in the mountains here and our house with its peace and quiet and it's little garden and livestock.  Sonny cooked meatloaf and potatoes au gratin last night and extra special scrambled eggs for breakfast this morning.  

I have been reluctant to write on this blog since my daughter died.  I am still saddened that I will see her no more, but every day I is easier knowing that she is in heaven now without pain or worry.  On Friday, Mike and I went to Sam's in Hot Springs and he surprised me with a picture on canvas that he had ordered.  The picture is of my daughter walking with her granddaughter across a field on my brother's farm.  It is lovely...beautiful colors, and I see things I recognize when I look at the painting.  My niece Crystal brought me a painting of my daughter done by a friend of hers, copied from a photograph on Eva's facebook.  It, too is a reminder that Eva is all right now, smiling and happy and in need of nothing but a picture frame.

Baby Chicks bought on March 23, 2012 will be giving us eggs before we know it!

So much has changed this past little while that I am glad for the chance to spend my words talking about what is going on with me.  The main thing that makes me hop out of bed in the mornings are the chickens.  We have enough yard space here that we are able to have a little chicken coop.  Mike built it.  He calls it a chicken tractor because he has wheels on one end of it and it is light weight, built of pvc pipe and chicken wire, and can be moved from place to place in our yard.  The chicks are six or eight weeks old right now.  When we brought them home from the farm store they were little peepers, all yellow and soft...and as time has progressed they have grown wings and are too big for the big old dog cage that we kept them in at first.  They are growing fast, almost too fast for me to read up on the subject so that I am able to give them the nutrients they need and watch out for the rainfall and high wind, the parasites and wildlife that might hurt them.  They are chicks now, but in no time at all they will probably be giving us eggs....which is why we are raising them.  

Another thing that brings me outside every day is our garden.  It, too is six or eight weeks old.  It was cold out when we put the cabbage and broccoli and cauliflower in the newly tilled dirt and the groundhog said there would be six more weeks of winter.  That didn't happen, so it has been touch and go with the heat and harsh sunshine making us wonder if the winter crops will mature before the hot summer kills the plants.  So far so good, we have a little broccoli and there's a brand new tiny little cauliflower out there and the asparagus is coming up, none of it enough to make a meal from, but enough to make Mike and I feel like planting the garden was worthwhile.  We also have tomatoes and bell peppers, the two things that grow the best, and lots of onion and even some potatoes.  Our garden is not a big thing, but it is something that makes me want to hop out of bed in the mornings.

Perhaps retirement is not everyone's cup of tea.  Perhaps life in Arkansas is too slow moving for some.  Perhaps not everyone collects rocking chairs or likes to sit in a porch swing or rock in a hammock under the trees.  Maybe some people want to be able drive to a big shopping mall every day and shop more than once or twice a week.  But, me, I think back on the rat race, driving to work every day, deciding what to fix for supper before I go to work and needing to figure out something for lunch every day and to be sure the laundry is done so I have the right clothes to wear to work, and I'm glad for the peace I find in retirement.    I don't miss the tiny yard or the neighbors or the homeowners association or the airplanes overhead or the noises of traffic on the highway.  I'm glad to be here where the occasional noisy truck or popping motorcycle passing by on the road in front of our house makes me stop to look.  I'm happy not to have any need to get used to those things.

Springtime Azaleas and Camelias bloom in our back yard.  The GumBall trees are gone.

I remember bits and pieces of this kind of life when I was young.  Living here makes me sometimes think about the farm my grandparents lived on.  Sometimes I think about the huge garden my Uncle has in front of his house right now today.  Sometimes I think about the little colored chicks that I got for Easter one year, watching them grow and crying when it was time to make dinner out of them.  Sometimes I think about learning to drive a tractor or about picking pecans shaded by huge old trees that dropped them.  I'm glad to have all these memories.  It makes me think less often about the sad things that life brings and makes me seek the joy and count the blessings.  It has made me today think about my blog and how I want to start writing in here and talk about the little chicks and about the pleasure of Crystal's visit!  Spring is here! Today the windows are all open and the sounds and smells of the world are making my life good.

Gypsy's puppies...Red and Blue are four years old now.  They'll always be puppies, though.